Control

Control is a funny thing. We are always searching for some type of control. And today I found mine and my sanity and peace!

This is the end of TTC for me. I have started taking clomid this cycle so I will continue, and I will also temp through till the end of this cycle but TTC is over. No more not doing something in case I am pg. The biggest one is exercise. I haven't done any recently as I was petrified of a miscarriage. Well no more. I know what is healthy and what is not. I wont go over board but definitely need to exercise. Run every AM and walk every evening. Throw in some core exercises and pilates and we are set. Nothing extreme but a must have. No more opk's, no more hpts unless AF is late, no more analysis of everything, cause honestly symptoms means nothing! I had them all no pregnancy, some women have none and end up pregnant! its all a game of chance!

I have to say I am already feeling better about it. If the universe has some other plan for me than being a mum I have to accept that and move on. I just have to hope that eventually it does show me the path cause at the moment I am walking around aimlessly. I know this may be hindering things and my clock is ticking with only a few good baby years a head of me but its all good all the time!I can do this!