I was letting everything get to me far too much. I was surrounded by negativity which was fine TTC is a horrible nightmare! I was there to love and support others, but sadly when my TWW started they disappeared because they thought I would get a BFP. My guilt got really bad because I so wanted it to be them too, but I also wanted it to be me so bad. It wasn't until my TWW ended that I heard from them again.
My journey is reaching the 11month mark now, although its not from constantly trying its from very hard extended miscarriages. But I have come to an acceptance. I miss some very special people very much. but it was better for them as well, they didn't need me there when my journey is different from theirs. They may not have realised it but some of the things said were aimed at me and really hurt. I let it go because TTC can be very hard, but I realised me just being their made their journey so much harder. and although I cherished every bit of their friendship, I had to let them go. This makes me very sad, but sometimes we just have to do the right thing even if it hurts.
I am not sure if they will even read this blog anymore, but that is OK. I know them breaking away from me will be helping them, as they don't have to stress and worry about someone else they know getting a bfp. They can continue on in the group and enjoy each others company without having someone there who has a different journey. One less stress for them in this horrible heartbreaking journey.
On another note, my body feels good this month. I feel like me! Well back to work, new position is keeping me VERY VERY busy!
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