Officially on Maternity leave

So after weeks and weeks of stress and the uni not offering me any security for my maternity leave, I contacted my current employer who said they would pay me the 14weeks.  I was really reluctant to take this though because I wasn't on my death bed and unless I am well and truly dying I don't even take sick leave.  Anyway after I had contacted them and told them my Dr had recommended I take leave due to stress they kinda forced my hand anyway.  So I am on sick leave for 2 days and my maternity leave starts on Monday.

It was amazing though I knew I was stressed but honestly didn't know how stressed.  I got home last night and I knew my feet and hands had been a bit puffy during the day but when I saw my face I couldn't believe it. Even DH was surprised at how puffy it was.  I knew I had been retaining fluid because I was constantly drinking but not going to the bathroom.  This of course is one of the first signs of high blood pressure.  So I took my blood pressure and it was through the roof. This was the moment I knew I had made the right decision.

I felt the weight really come off me last night and then this morning OMG I feel like a completely different person.  I slept on and off for 12hours last night, I had to get up and pee so many times which I knew that meant my blood pressure was going down.  I took it this morning and it was back to its low level. which was such a relief high blood pressure can be fatal to unborn babies and OMG did that thought scare the crap out of me.

It was so stupid of me, I was so worried about doing the right thing by everyone else that I hadn't really taken into account the full impact this could be having on me and the baby.  I would have never forgiven myself if something bad had happened to bubs because I wanted to keep everyone else happy.

It feels weird to not have a job! I have maternity leave for 14weeks but no job to go back to! I haven't not worked since I was 14 and 9 months.  Even through uni I always worked!

On other notes I have antenatal classes starting tonight.  That should be fun, looking forward to that.  Not sure what to expect but it something different!

Well its raining here today so I am going to take full advantage of it and just chill and relax for the day! YAY! Its an amazing feeling, after years of work stress, TTC stress and miscarriages I am surprised I am somehow still sane!