How good is it? A new and wonderful year, endless possibilities!! So exciting!
Happy new year everyone.
Berry
Tyler
Blake
Friday, December 31, 2010
really seriously?
Man there are some nasty pieces of work in this world. Trust a selfish person to try and bring me down on this happy day. Was always all about them. Thing is I would never wish or think a mean thing toward anyone. No matter the nasty things that were said I would never wish anything bad to happen. I wish them all the happiness in the world and I hope they find the peace they are after, I am just glad it wont be anywhere near me. I have come across people like this many times. lol true Gemini's nice as pie to your face just don't turn around! But I am not going to get caught up in this absolute petty crap! Man we are adults not children! There are so many way more important things in life.
Well lucky for me I have had a wonderful night and nothing is going to ruin my happiness :) Went out with DH and a mate for dinner. 2011 is going to be a great year! Happiness is what you make it and if you let the negative people in life bring you down you will never find true joy and happiness. There are moments on this TTC journey that have been hard, but I had this journey for a reason, to make me a better stronger person and I will never forget the journey ever. Shame some people have, guess they just saw the wrong side of it. Guess the first mistake was thinking what you went through was harder. No one journey is harder, if you struggle to conceive no matter how long or how many you loose or what ever its a tough difficult journey. Making it a competition is how you loose friends.
Bring on 2011 I say, its definitely going to be a happy prosperous year!
Well lucky for me I have had a wonderful night and nothing is going to ruin my happiness :) Went out with DH and a mate for dinner. 2011 is going to be a great year! Happiness is what you make it and if you let the negative people in life bring you down you will never find true joy and happiness. There are moments on this TTC journey that have been hard, but I had this journey for a reason, to make me a better stronger person and I will never forget the journey ever. Shame some people have, guess they just saw the wrong side of it. Guess the first mistake was thinking what you went through was harder. No one journey is harder, if you struggle to conceive no matter how long or how many you loose or what ever its a tough difficult journey. Making it a competition is how you loose friends.
Bring on 2011 I say, its definitely going to be a happy prosperous year!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
OMG
I am in a completely state of shock right now!
I'm actually pregnant. tested 12DPO and the line although lighter than the control its well and truly there.
I never thought this day would ever come again. The next 8weeks and 2 days will be nerve racking but I am just so happy and relieved to be pregnant again!
Wow gob smacked! Please mr/mrs universe let me keep this one!
I just had to add this photo in too. I bought these shirts as my idea of surprising DH when I finally got those two lines. lol I was a little excited at 4am, but I did manage to put mine on and give him his. He already knew though when being woken up at that time. hehe. You will have to forgive the state of us both, we haven't had much sleep in about a week due to us both being sick!
I'm actually pregnant. tested 12DPO and the line although lighter than the control its well and truly there.
I never thought this day would ever come again. The next 8weeks and 2 days will be nerve racking but I am just so happy and relieved to be pregnant again!
Wow gob smacked! Please mr/mrs universe let me keep this one!
I just had to add this photo in too. I bought these shirts as my idea of surprising DH when I finally got those two lines. lol I was a little excited at 4am, but I did manage to put mine on and give him his. He already knew though when being woken up at that time. hehe. You will have to forgive the state of us both, we haven't had much sleep in about a week due to us both being sick!
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
exhausted
Well this cough that I have has upped it a few thousand notches. I am thinking its bronchitis. I always manage to get it every Christmas! GRRR I didn't get much sleep last night at all and my chest and throat are so sore. I have even managed to start throwing up because I am coughing so much! yuk!
Because of this my temp was really nice and high this morning. I got the minimum 3hours sleep before taking my temp as the last time I got up due to a coughing fit was 1:30am but I would say its just my body fighting it thats pushed it up.
I had some sharp pains yesterday afternoon on the right side. I wanted to think maybe implantation but I have talked myself out of that. bbs are still sore but again still not thinking much of it, they just don't feel sore enough. I know of many girls that have had miscarriages and the 2nd/3rd time they fell pregnant they didn't have a strong a symptoms are the first time round. But me thinking that is just grabbing at straws. I was going to test tomorrow but I honestly don't think there is any point. I know it will be negative! :( On the other hand it doesn't feel like AF is on the way either but that could still be another 5-6days off yet.
Alright already 2010 you can go away now!
Because of this my temp was really nice and high this morning. I got the minimum 3hours sleep before taking my temp as the last time I got up due to a coughing fit was 1:30am but I would say its just my body fighting it thats pushed it up.
I had some sharp pains yesterday afternoon on the right side. I wanted to think maybe implantation but I have talked myself out of that. bbs are still sore but again still not thinking much of it, they just don't feel sore enough. I know of many girls that have had miscarriages and the 2nd/3rd time they fell pregnant they didn't have a strong a symptoms are the first time round. But me thinking that is just grabbing at straws. I was going to test tomorrow but I honestly don't think there is any point. I know it will be negative! :( On the other hand it doesn't feel like AF is on the way either but that could still be another 5-6days off yet.
Alright already 2010 you can go away now!
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
disliking the festive season
OK so to carry on from yesterday, I was on my ipod and it was nearly flat.
So I have to say I am struggling with the festive season a bit. Had a fairly nice Christmas day with my family and then we headed up to the sunshine coast to spend a few days with DH's family. All fairly nice. Hard to portray feelings on here but I feel really flat about it all!! Again let me say again I have come to accept our little girl wasn't meant to be but it doesn't stop me thinking that I should have a 6 month old daughter now and that Christmas would have been so different. 
Doesn't help that I am 9DPO and I feel nothing. I have some mild cramps and sore bbs but its not pregnancy stuff. I know its early days but I am just not feeling it. I was hoping to a brilliant start to 2011 but I don't think its going to happen. I have started to steel my mind toward plugging out the next 3months and getting to the end of March. Unfortunately if we do get there we would be looking at perhaps doing something in the April cycle. Problem is DH and I are heading back to his home town for his Brother's son's baptism. They have asked DH and I to be god parents are we feel so blessed they asked something so amazing of us. But we will be heading down there for 2 weeks in April. So really we are looking at May. Feels like this journey will never end. that will take us to 13months of TTC after the trouble miscarriage and a total of 20months of TTC thats just depressing.
I had a conversation with the gf of one of DH's brothers yesterday. She made a comment about people making extra drama in their life and always acting like everything has to be a fight and why can't people just be happy and live for the now etc. I was a little annoyed by this comment so I had to say something, very diplomatically and didn't indicate any annoyance toward her. Seriously no one wants this crap. Yes there are some people out there who thrive on drama. I am definitely not one of those. I like my life simple and drama free. I like keeping things grounded and yes there are times in the month I can get emotional but ultimately unless warranted I try to keep myself fairly level. Unfortunately when it comes to miscarriages and TTC things don't stay that way. I honestly thought having babies would be easy. I never expected or wanted any of this crap to happen. I would have rathered stayed pregnant last year, had my baby and lived happy ever after. No drama, no roller coaster, no crap, no heartache no pain no sadness. But I didn't get that and I am trying the best I can to keep fighting. I tried to see it from her perspective in that although she is older than me they haven't been in their relationship that long, they rent a house, aren't planning on getting married any time soon, spend all their time partying and doing what most people would do in their early 20's. We are just at different stages of life, but why do people find the need to say offensive stuff without thinking!
Something I have found over the course of the last 16months is that the main people who have an opinion on infertility, miscarriages or TTC are those that have never had to do any of it or go through any of it! Especially those who had multiple kids and fell pregnant straight away.
OK rant over!
I would like to stay hopeful for this month, still 3 days for possible implantation but after 8 months I am sorry but the doubt and skepticism is there. The baby dream has definitely faded for me. oh well. Universe
-------> 
me!
Looking forward to just starting fresh in 2011, only 3 days to go.
Doesn't help that I am 9DPO and I feel nothing. I have some mild cramps and sore bbs but its not pregnancy stuff. I know its early days but I am just not feeling it. I was hoping to a brilliant start to 2011 but I don't think its going to happen. I have started to steel my mind toward plugging out the next 3months and getting to the end of March. Unfortunately if we do get there we would be looking at perhaps doing something in the April cycle. Problem is DH and I are heading back to his home town for his Brother's son's baptism. They have asked DH and I to be god parents are we feel so blessed they asked something so amazing of us. But we will be heading down there for 2 weeks in April. So really we are looking at May. Feels like this journey will never end. that will take us to 13months of TTC after the trouble miscarriage and a total of 20months of TTC
thats just depressing. I had a conversation with the gf of one of DH's brothers yesterday. She made a comment about people making extra drama in their life and always acting like everything has to be a fight and why can't people just be happy and live for the now etc. I was a little annoyed by this comment so I had to say something, very diplomatically and didn't indicate any annoyance toward her. Seriously no one wants this crap. Yes there are some people out there who thrive on drama. I am definitely not one of those. I like my life simple and drama free. I like keeping things grounded and yes there are times in the month I can get emotional but ultimately unless warranted I try to keep myself fairly level. Unfortunately when it comes to miscarriages and TTC things don't stay that way. I honestly thought having babies would be easy. I never expected or wanted any of this crap to happen. I would have rathered stayed pregnant last year, had my baby and lived happy ever after. No drama, no roller coaster, no crap, no heartache no pain no sadness. But I didn't get that and I am trying the best I can to keep fighting. I tried to see it from her perspective in that although she is older than me they haven't been in their relationship that long, they rent a house, aren't planning on getting married any time soon, spend all their time partying and doing what most people would do in their early 20's. We are just at different stages of life, but why do people find the need to say offensive stuff without thinking!
Something I have found over the course of the last 16months is that the main people who have an opinion on infertility, miscarriages or TTC are those that have never had to do any of it or go through any of it! Especially those who had multiple kids and fell pregnant straight away.
OK rant over!
I would like to stay hopeful for this month, still 3 days for possible implantation but after 8 months I am sorry but the doubt and skepticism is there. The baby dream has definitely faded for me. oh well. Universe
-------> me!Looking forward to just starting fresh in 2011, only 3 days to go.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Happy holiday - hmm not so much
Well merry Christmas too all those that may still read. Hope you all had a wonderful time with your loved ones.I find the festive season very hard. my 2nd Christmas with no baby and still not pregnant. Not feeling it this cycle either:( nothing I can do about it. Just have to look forward to April when we can move onto some else. Thinking at this point might just go straigt to ing but we might have to go 3 rounds of iui. At this rate i'll be lucky to have a baby before I turn 30. Oh well best get back to te festivities. At least we are away for a few days.I keep thinking 2011 will be better but starting to have my doubts.:(
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Its a good day
I have to say its a good day. A group I used to be part of one of the girls finally got her long awaited and well deserved BFP! She has a nervous 8week wait a head but I think she has well and truly been through enough and deserves to have this one with out any other stresses.
Its about time you did something nice universe so don't stop now!
Its about time you did something nice universe so don't stop now!
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