Its getting harder

First off I have to say that I am still so very thankful for this little one inside me.  I do feel so blessed every single day and I really can't wait to meet it.

But after sailing through the pregnancy to date it is definitely starting to get harder.

I am back to throwing up again, I can't eat much food, the heartburn is really painful and seeing as I can't stop burping and most of the time they are spew burps the acid is getting right up into my mouth which is gross and painful.  I can't seem to drink much water which is hard because I am starting to feel really dehydrated, adding to my already really bad headaches. My muscles are getting sore now, upper and lower back are starting to hurt, the pubic symphsis pain is getting worse.  And now added to that we have that really heavy downward pressure that is radiating down the back of my legs!  My girly bits and the back bits feel like they want to flip inside out when ever I walk or sit too long! I always have the feeling of needing to have a BM but usually can't.  My tummy feels oh so completely full and tight, and bub still has to double in size yet!  The movements are REALLY big and starting to get really painful.  Oh and also getting a pain under my ribs on the right hand side.  Not sure what that is about!

In saying all of this I wouldn't give it up for the world but I have to admit I can't wait to get my body back in a few weeks time. I am well and truly counting the days down now!

I am still really disorganised. I have so much to do, I knew I should have gotten into it a few weeks back but I kept thinking I had so much more time! But now that I am feeling sicker than the 1st trimester I am not sure how much I will actually get done.  I know I have to push though because it has to get done before bubs arrives but when even mustering enough energy just to sit here on the couch is hard enough, nesting is the last thing on my mind.

I am going to try and head out and get some raspberry leaf tea and tablets today.  I want to have the tea until I am 34weeks and then start taking the tablets. Also start to take evening primrose tablets soon too.  In saying this though, I am happy if bub comes are early as 37weeks as this is considered full term so perhaps it would be good to start all that stuff now.

I weighed myself this morning! OMG although it was what I was expecting its still a shock! I am still walking everyday although it is getting so much harder.  The pubic pain and round ligament pain make me completely breathless at times.

right off to try and muster enough energy to do something, this house is a horrid mess!

31weeks

Since our scan on Friday I haven't been able to stop looking at little peanuts pics.  I really can't wait to meet this little munchkin now and for some strange reason today I am so scared all at the same time.  I know so much can still go wrong at this point and the thought of loosing this little one scares the hell out of me.  If I don't feel it move for half and hour or so I get worried!

I know two of the biggest causes of still birth are pre-eclampsia and untreated gestational diabetes.  Both of which I don't have. but this isn't helping stop my worry.  I know what its little face looks like, its nose, its mouth its fingers and toes. I just want the next 9 week to hurry up!

With still 9 weeks to go it can't possibly be engaging yet but its definitely really low down in my pelvis.  It is really uncomfortable to walk, a really really heavy downward pressure. I don't mind if it comes early though but not for another 5 weeks.  I want to make it to full term at least!

Probably should go have a nap, have had a head cold for about a week now just makes me tired throughout the day probably what is making more emotional.  I am sure peanut will be fine just that over protective mum instinct kicking in!

3D/4D scan photos

Well I have to say it was so worth the money.  It was fantastic to see peanut, its grown so much.  Its sitting down low in my pelvis which I was surprised at still having 9 weeks to go but it would explain the pubic symphsis pain.  We got over 200 fantastic photos and a 25min long DVD!

I don't want to guess if I think its a girl or boy I am too scared to guess wrong lol

Some pics though :) I really can't wait to meet it now though so cute and I just want to give it a big cuddle!

 

2nd Antenatal class

so we are home from our 2nd antenatal class and I have a few things to think about following it.  It covered a normal vaginal birth and pain relief. The vaginal birth was fine, I planned on this, it was the pain relief that was an eye opener. I always wanted to try and do it naturally but now even more so.  Firstly I think if I give in to an epidural I will feel a sense of failure.  I know that sometimes when labour is very difficult it is well and truly needed. For me though I really want to try and push it and only have one if there looks like no other option.  I have nothing against women who do have them,  pain is relative for every woman and we all have our personal choices. For me though I know how I think and I know if I have one I will feel like a failure.

Other than that aspect all the drugs really worry me.  I have a higher risk when having an epidural this I already know but if you experience this they give you this drug or experience that you get that drug to counteract it. Far too many drugs coming into play here.  As I said if it becomes necessary then I will have one but I will try my hardest. I also don't like the other things that can happen, like the need for forceps and suction due to the decrease in muscle strength and possible pushing power.  I definitely do not want pethidine.  This is for certain,  it crosses the placenta and I don't want our baby having any narcotics.

I do have a book here birth skills,  I know in my mind I have been mentally working through the thoughts of labour.  How I think I will try to work through the pain but perhaps it is time to pull out the book and have a read.  I have been having trouble reading it because it is stuff I am already thinking but perhaps if it the fully naturally way I want to go toward then getting all the arsenal might be very helpful.

I have more facts now which is good too and this will help me through the process.  I focus on time.  If I know that I have say 12-14hours in the first stage, 6 hours in the 2nd and 2hours in the 3rd then I will work toward this.  If you are hoping or thinking it will be shorter it will be harder to work through it. If you expect the worst and it turns out better its always a nicer thing to deal with.

Other than that it did get me thinking about the changes it would make to down there.  To date its something I have not wanted to think about.  We will be using an epi-no from 34weeks to help reduce the chance of tearing and hopefully it does but seeing the video tonight OMG the trauma that is caused to that area, the stretching. It definitely will never be the same again.  Everyone says about feeling the head as it crowns or watching it with a mirror.  hmm no thank you, yes I want to experience a natural birth and look forward to feeling my baby come out but I prefer not to think about the damage being done.

On another note headache and sickness still there! Its OK though I will deal with it. There are worse things!  I have started getting pubic symphysis pain, pretty bad really.  Its getting very painful to walk but again its all in the mind. If I let it get to me it will.  I just have to push though it. I am still going for my daily walks which are very difficult with the pubic pain but also the round ligament pains but they do make me feel good so I am going to continue unless I really physically can't walk!!

Well just wanted to get out my thoughts on the natural birth.  I still have some things to think through and discuss with DH so he knows and understands my wishes so when in real pain and perhaps weakening in my resolve he can remind me why I made the decisions I did.

Back to watching origin!

the honeymoon is over

30w3d

So the 2nd trimester honeymoon is well and truly over. I have started getting sick again and it is definitely deja vu  from the first trimester.  I have been trying to eat well, I am on leave so thought yep more time to prepare food etc, but bubba thinks over wise.  I am constantly starving at the moment and if I don't constantly eat I start throwing up.  I have had a massive headache for 2 days now and although I do take panadine I only take it 2 tablets on one day and then stop for a few days.  It doesn't affect bubs at all its still super active when I take it but I don't like to risk it.  When I started throwing up yesterday I couldn't believe it.

I eat something like toast or something heavy at least and I feel better for maybe an hour and then I am STARVING again.  I don't want to eat because I am now definitely putting on far too much weight but I don't seem to have a choice. I tried the small meals regularly, healthy ones etc but they get digested in 10mins and yep again starving!  I am assuming its from the growth spurt I have been assuming its going through right now, but seriously peanut, mums butt and thighs can't take much more lol!!!

I know its definitely grown in the last few days, its kicks are absolutely massive now and so strong. I do hope this eating phase passes though! I don't mind the weight gain I know I can get it off once bub is born but I really don't like feeling sick and having headaches all the time. I know its all worth it, I just have so much I need to get done and sleeping all day just feels lazy but I can't seem to muster anything else.  Well besides eating! Perhaps we will go in our 3 day cycles again, then I will get 3days where I can get stuff done while I am feeling a bit better.

On another note my 3D/4D scans were rescheduled yesterday.  Apparently there machine went down so I now have my appointment at 5pm on Friday.  Which is OK Friday will be here before I know it and it was probably a good thing seeing as I was throwing up yesterday afternoon.

Well I am going to go have a hot shower to see if I can ease off this cracking headache!

9w6d TO GO!

And there it is 9w6d OMG it looks so good :) hehe it really feels like its starting to get close now. The count down and well and truly on!

So yesterday I think I finally started to master the whole pottering thing! the trick is to take your time.  Because I have been so used to being so busy for so very long, I do everything at a million miles an hour. now I know to do a bit here and do a bit there and firstly its so much more relaxing but 2nd it takes up more time! :)

I still have so much to do around the house, I know that getting the house into an efficient working hub will make things so much easier when bub is here.  The laundry is nearly there.  I want to make a few more changes so its 100% right.  Little things like install the ironing board onto the wall so you only have to put it up and down rather than put it fully away might only take 2 seconds off but that 2sec will add up.  I have to get into both the bathrooms.  The nursery is mostly done just a few bits and pieces.  I have washed everything I have but I haven't made up the cot or anything.  That can wait until 35weeks :)

DH has been getting lots more work recently which is fantastic! He still drives me bonkers lol but what partner doesn't. At least now the stress is off a bit I don't feel like killing him everyday! We had a laugh with Dr A, and we have apologised in advance that we will fight in the delivery suite and I am I very sorry if I punch him.  We are both very stubborn and DH is a typical country boy and although he normally means very well he usually completely misses the mark when it comes to women and how we think and feel.  When in labour I know the last thing on my mind will be its OK he means well.

I remember when we first started dating, we were only on about our 3rd date, I was slim for me, probably just under my ideal weight. But that being said I have always been very sporty and muscly so I have never been slender.  His comment to me was, its OK your just Thick! lol meaning thick set! I was very confident with how I looked at the time so this comment just slid right off my back but now having put on far too much weight he still says stupid stuff like that without thinking! Hurts a little more these days. I am sure the pregnancy hormones don't help. If you know the super cheap add where he sends the kid home in a cab and turns up with a car full of stuff.  The "What" look on that mans face is a look I get very often. lol.

Well probably should get onto some pottering! hehe oh and did I mention 9w6d to go! YAY

30weeks

YAY finally in the last stage.  The final 10weeks! We have made it into the 3's!!! Bubs has been going through a growth spurt today, I can tell because firstly its quiet on the movement front, and I have killer heartburn, nothing absolutely nothing gets rid of it. That and always hungry.

I have also been getting a really heavy downward pressure today, really uncomfortable to walk.  I can't imagine how uncomfortable its going to be when bub doubles in size!!!  Its about 1.5kg now and it will be born at at least 3.5kg!

So my 30week belly shot :)

tomorrow we are down to 9w6d!! single digits!! WHOOHOO so exciting!