An answer

finally an answer this cycle! I didn't test this morning but my temp was its classic 36.61 pre AF dip.  So AF should arrive tomorrow.

I am a little nervous about my appointment this morning.  Not sure why. I hope they don't just throw us out because we have been pregnant twice, and only been back trying for 7 months. but 15months is a very long time and I am not getting any younger. 28 on Sunday :( depressing thought! I don't care about being 28, I have no problem with getting older. good things come as you get older. Its that my clock is ticking and realistically I only have about 7 years of good baby making left and we want 5 kids :( we are cutting it extremely fine!

But at least with it being CD1 tomorrow we can do this cycle as the IVF clinic wants to. I thought we would miss it as I was supposed to be CD3 today. We might be pregnant by chirstmas. That would be so nice! :)

Oh and my baby princess came homes yesterday. i was so relieved. I love her far to much for anything to have happened to her.  Her coming back was my miracle for that month. I couldn't ask for another one. I am just so happy she is home safe and sound.

grrr

I give up no idea what is going on :( temp still up test neg. bbs a little tender but not worth writing home about. Stupid body. AF doesn't even feel close! definitely don't eel pregnant either though.

Peppa still not home :( REALLY REALLY REALLY  worried about her now :(

tuff day

:( it has been a very tough day today.  Doesn't help that I am extremely tired.  I haven't really slept in about 3 weeks.  I go through bouts of insomnia and this one its hitting home. Started about 3 months ago, and has slowly gotten worse! :( down to about 4 hours sleep a night on a good night.

So factor that in, and that my poor little bubby still hasn't come home, I have no idea if I am pregnant or the universe is playing some nasty games with me and you have me in a very thin state.

My bbs are still tender but no where near as sore as they were this morning so thinking AF was just delayed! YAY!
DH is watching the footy and I can't keep my eyes open so might try to head to bed early.

it just gets better

15DPO no sign of AF and test still Negative.  My bbs are REALLY sore today, my mucus is leaning more toward EW! seriously WTF is going on! I also feel really sick today :( My temp is still really high!

Have to wait till tomorrow now!

On another note, my little kitten is missing. She is my little baby, I am so worried about her. She is about 7/8months old now but she is still so tiny. We think she might have gone on heat so we had her locked inside but when we got home from dinner she was gone.  We think she pushed the screen out in our bedroom window.  Its not like her to be gone this long! Please come up baby!

Hopefully tomorrow I find out one way or the other. Definitely still hoping and praying I am pregnant!

OK really confused now!

At this point I am trying to reel myself in. It is probably nothing at all and just another game being played with me, but today I am 14DPO AF is due tomorrow and my temp really spiked!!! It has happened before but always on 13DPO. My bbs are still tender.  Not sore just I can definitely feel them. Get strong stabby pains every now and again. No AF cramps to speak of. I have a twinge pain high on the left. That can be normal for me but its intensified today! CM is still creamy but not as much there as there has been in the past few days. it is only early though so more time will tell.

Problem is I POAS this morning and it was negative. Granted I only had an IC left :( and even last year when  I tested on 15DPO for the first time the line on the IC was so faint DH disagreed it was even there.

So I have a few theories! Love my theories.
1. Best outcome I am pregnant. I know my body takes FOREVER to get rid of hCG so maybe it takes a while to build up levels too.
2. I ovulated late or even twice as I had very prominent watery CM later in my cycle and my temperature went very strange!
3. Not pregnant and the universe I laughing extremely hard at this little prank its playing on me!

Trying hard not to get hope up as my luck would have my temp crashing out tomorrow and AF arriving. Either way if that happens I have my appointment on Monday to look forward to.

Nervous

so, temp stayed up this morning but test was negative. My bbs are still strangely sore today more so than yesterday, but I haven't got any hope that I am some how pregnant.

I rang and made an appointment with the IVF clinic today! They fitted me in Monday morning at 10:40am.  I couldn't believe it! WOOHOO! Would be nice to get a shot this next cycle.  I know I shouldn't get my hopes up that we will but Monday will only CD3 thats good odds. Dr A recommended the 100mg of clomid again so I think i will do that and then if they have to give me a HCG trigger shot for the IUI there will be some eggs there to release.  If the clomid doesn't work we can try FSH next cycle.

Can't monitor how many follicles I have though seeing as you can never see anything due to my stupidly position uterus. Guess it will be a fire away and hope! DH and I will still BD in the hope that we can get some swimmers up there on our own as well.  I think u have to abstain for a bit before the collection of the sample for IUI but I am sure we can get one in before that time frame and then after the IUI!

I am so nervous and excited all that the same time.  I am worry that I have gotten my hopes up that this will work!

DH is still hopeful on this cycle.  Made me ask what the IVFs cancellation policy was.  They said I can ring Monday morning and cancel if I am pregnant. I guess its the outcomes we want so they will be happy for us.  They must know no one wants to go through all these hassles if they don't have to.

I filled out all the forms today! Some of the questions were funny.  One was, at what age did you start to develop breasts and grow pubic hair. I mean seriously I can't remember crap like that!

Bring on Monday I say!  Off to dinner tomorrow night for an early birthday celebration. My sister is home for the weekend so it will be nice to celebrate it with all the family!

I didn't get the birthday present I really wanted but hopefully I get it for a Christmas present instead!!!!

Funny thing I was thinking yesterday, This time last year I was blissfully, innocently pregnant.  In 8 more days my world came crashing down and changed forever!

Ahead we move

So as I think I said in my last post pretty positive we aren't UTD this month.  POAS this morning and Negative although not a surprise at all.  I have no symptoms.  I have cramps on the left but bbs aren't really sore, stabby pains every now and again but nothing to make me think even remotely pregnant.  Other than that I have very strange watery CM. Seriously AF is due in 3 days why do I have watery CM, question if I ovulated but I definitely have a shift even if my temp has been all over the shop this month. Starting to wonder if I even took the 100mg of clomid! I had absolutely nothing this month to indicate I had taken it! stupid strange cycle!

So anyway after POAS this morning and it being negative I contacted Dr A for a Referral to Dr D! My worry is that we wont get in soon enough and we miss out on this next cycle! :(

anyway Melbourne cup day today! YAY! Not that I ever do much but do get to leave the office at 1pm and thats always good!